DailyJoke118
Clyde Jin
2020-08-08
27

1、会上,某下属极力赞美经理,称其高标准,高要求的工作态度值得众人学习。 此时,经理满意地抿了口咖啡。 会后经理对递来咖啡的下属大发脾气,温度怎么没到常温,糖怎么放这么少?

2、今天早上,我遇到了我以前的老板,便微笑着对他说:“老板早啊!我真是要好好感谢你,如果当初你没解雇我,我就不会过上现在这样闲散舒适,不劳而获的好日子。” 老板也笑了笑说不用客气,然后在我面前的碗里丢了一块钱。

3、单位组织英语培训,听了半节课回来与同事讨论培训怎么样,告诉他们说:“我有的能听懂有的听不懂” 同事说:“那你还行了。” 我接着说:“老师说汉语的时候我能听懂,老师讲英语的时候我听不懂”

4、一领导走进办公室,看见两个女职员就说:“不是告诉你们不用脱嘛!怎么又在这里脱啊!不过既然脱了就脱净点。” 女直言很尴尬地说:“我们已经脱得很干净了。” 领导说:“那你们就再辛苦一点,把桌子下面也拖一下吧。”

5、一上班族嗜赌如命,欠下好几万高利贷。 债主抓到他,狠狠地教训了一顿说:“没钱还,就要剁手指!先把他的食指给我剁下来!” 上班族大惊:“求求你们了!千万别剁食指!我还要用来打卡的啊!”

6、我:你玩儿过的女人年龄跨度有多大? 同事:差不多十岁吧。 我:涉猎够广的啊! 同事:唉!时光荏苒,记得刚认识我老婆的时候她才二十岁,现如今都三十了。 我。。。

7、一男一女周一上班同时迟到,结果男被扣发奖金,女却安然无恙。 男职员很不服气,跑去质问女职员:“我迟到挨罚,是因为睡过头了,你同样迟到,为什么没挨罚?” “我睡过头儿了。”女职员答。

 

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