DailyJoke141
Clyde Jin
2020-08-31
42

1、有个人工作能力很强,但一直没被重用,又一次平级换岗。 领导怕他有意见,于是安慰他说:这是背心改乳罩,谁然没上提,但位置很重要!

2、局长拿来几张表,让办公室主任对局里的工作环境提建议。 办公室主任让女秘书小张帮他写,写好后看都没看就交到了局长那里。 过了几天,局长把主任叫到办公室,对他说:“你的建议采纳了,不过人家女浴室的事儿,你怎么知道得那么清楚呀?”

3、郭德纲:“孙悟空很傻很天真,他就是一只猴,永远不可能是人。他看守蟠桃园,7个仙女过来摘桃,他喊了一声定,这7个仙女都定这儿了,他竟然转身去摘桃了!可见猴就是猴啊!” 于谦:“要是你呢?” 郭德纲:“我得拿个篮子。”

4、展昭给马汉讲自己的英勇故事:“那天我打探逍遥楼,获得重要情报,却误中机关,身受重伤。我强提一口真气,支撑到开封府,突然眼前一黑。” 马汉关切的问:“你昏倒了?” 展昭:“不,是包大人出来了。”

5、小妖甲看见小妖乙,问:“很久不见,你怎么这么憔悴?” 小妖乙说:“别提了,前一阵子,大王叫我去巡山,抓个和尚做晚餐。” 小妖甲:“抓到了吗?” 小妖乙后悔地一拍大腿:“抓是抓到了,可那和尚每天做晚餐,只会做萝卜和白菜!”

6、从前有位王子想娶真正的公主。某夜,一位公主前来投宿。

王子为试其真假,在床上放了一颗豌豆,然后铺了十二张床垫子,二十床鸭绒被。

次日问她睡得如何? 公主骂道:尼妹,床垫得那么高,爬了一夜都没爬上去。

7、大雄是一个善良正直乐于助人的孩子,但他胆小懦弱,又有些懒,经常受到父母老师责骂和同学的欺负。 每次大雄遇到困难,他的好朋友哆啦A梦都会用神奇的百宝袋和各种奇妙道具帮助他渡过难关。 后人为了纪念他们,修建了大雄宝殿。

 

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